You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
