My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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