his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
what day is it and did you see me today?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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