you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
