and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
