mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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