We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Randomize
