Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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