wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
