my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
