Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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