Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Randomize
