it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
