thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
