They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
