I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
