There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
there is glitter all over my balls
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
