My nipple is on Facebook.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize