You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize