How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
