Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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