I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize