I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize