those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
