Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize