it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
