whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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