So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize