You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
