I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
