good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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