People in love make me want to vomit
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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