I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Randomize
