was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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