There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
