if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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