She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
