It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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