why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
