I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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