I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Randomize
