I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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