Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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