she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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