No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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