She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I need a burrito and a hug.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
