it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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