I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
if only i could text you this smell
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
