I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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