I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Randomize