Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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