goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Dick very happy bro
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
